She asked me to stop talkin to her.. :(
I kept clearin my outbox,
makin more space in my inbox..
I had all d pleasure seein her name,
it was more than when i got fame..
I loved d Names diction,
i m afraid if it'd all b a fiction.. :-(
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
makin more space in my inbox..
I had all d pleasure seein her name,
it was more than when i got fame..
I loved d Names diction,
i m afraid if it'd all b a fiction.. :-(
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was asked for three things I like in her :)
3 things bout u i like.,
1st n 4most, dat u r a psych(o).. :-P
The number 3 seems so small.
Cuz u r d best o all...!
The way u care.,
to compete u i swear,
no one can even dare....
Hey sweety,
i ve seen no one so pretty!
Believe me...
the most handsome man ll go down on his knee,
n for ya love he ll plea..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3 things bout u i like.,
1st n 4most, dat u r a psych(o).. :-P
The number 3 seems so small.
Cuz u r d best o all...!
The way u care.,
to compete u i swear,
no one can even dare....
Hey sweety,
i ve seen no one so pretty!
Believe me...
the most handsome man ll go down on his knee,
n for ya love he ll plea..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I ve got a lotta gals to flirt,
but wen ya din talk to me it hurt...:-(
Its time for me to dine,
i m not fine, cuz i wasn allowed to explain... :-(
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
U r always ma sweetheart,
Der's nothin which can make us part....
If at all der is a force,
i ll kill d source..!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lies dun make ya happy? ;-)
i lied thinkin u still wore a nappy...
Now dat u r grown,
i wanna make ya ma own...
I cant deny d fact dat u r beautiful...
The kick i get cuz o ya is more dan i get in a full ;-).. :-)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I dun wan ya to cry,
it makes ma heart a fry....
Stop cryin...
or else to put mokka i ll start tryin! :-P
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
suchaaaaaaa.. ru in love?????? who is that lucky princesss???? god save sucha!!!!!
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeletedei!! english katthako da... summa rhyme pannuantu words apdi ipdi use pannre.. :-) noun /verb yella adjectivea use pannre. who says"i got a fame" "you're a psyche"...no offense dude .. but please read it yourself before you post it.
ReplyDeleteoh sorry! didn't realise you were putting mokkai with this poem.. i thought sincerea feel pannre !!!:-) lol sorry machan
ReplyDeleteCha illa da.. Not mokkai.. This is serious stuff man.. Its gud dat you told.. :) These were actually the first few poems which I started to write..Fame is a noun here and I meant the greek princess "Psyche" da.. Please refer the link below..
ReplyDeletehttp://www.thefreedictionary.com/Psyche
Anywys, I really appreciate ya comments.. :)
very crazy! very you! _ cute anyway!
ReplyDeleteGood one again. Nice rhyming lines.
ReplyDeleteone point - the paragraphs doesnt seem to connect to each other. The flow of emotions need to be maintained through out. Suddenly there are happy lines, all of a sudden a dull and sad line.
Really its a touching thoughts.Hope that u have pondered all ur sorrows will write some delightful and joyful poems here on.
ReplyDelete@ Christina
ReplyDeleteI ll i ll :)
@ KP
Dats y i called em snippets kp.. Thx for ya comments. Please keep commenting and reading too.. :P
Paps, let me tell this frank. You dont have a standard prose, you dont have capturing poetic style, your rhyming is damn skewed at times, the poetic sense is obtuse.....but thats how it was supposed to be ;)..Glad that you havent dissolved yourself in that poetic pompousness in which snooty wannabe poets like me ;) try immersing themselves...Its always good to be urself, and get thoughts straight frm the heart...even if a style is tad deviating from the normal...its always different....so that makes yours different and abstract...and yeh..love lost and found is always crazy...enough of desperation for the old and lost...start writing about HOPE..desperation for hope!!;)
ReplyDeletemy blog (with sm crap poems)http://fuzzeescrawls.blogspot.com/
Dai, nee enna thitriya illa paratriyane therila da.. :P
ReplyDeleteThanks anywys for commenting.. :)
Completely agree with shivram.. Wat matters is the content and the feel of the poem.. And it's interesting and funny unlike most poems which r dry and serious... :)
ReplyDelete@snehit: ever heard of a term called poetic licence/artistic licence? :P
super da machan..... esp the last 2 paras.. too good... nalla mappu yerichu.... :)
ReplyDeleteMaachi,
ReplyDeleteVery nice one.. but u will have to accept the fact tat its an amature poem...
N given tat fact, its kind of an above average..
As ppl have said above, don't sacifice the language for the rhyme...
U either start of happy end sad or start sad n end happy(i preffer the second one), but dont mix up... ppl might get confused wat u wanna tell, or is tat the purpose??? ;)
But one thing da... i loved it... its much better than those F*** related poems or those sadistic stuff :)...
machi.. at last etho lite-a feelings vittu peel aagi vandhutta pola..
ReplyDeletegood one..
un kitta irundhu innum neraya ethir paakkiren..
somethin more than the usual 'my gal' stuff
Sucha..you do have a flair for writing mate...these poems have a style of its own...but i have one question to you..is it one gal or more you are talking about...just kidding man...
ReplyDeleteDude keep writing and let the word of love spread it wings...not to fly but accomodate you..